Divorce Mediation – Is It Possible?

You can't talk to your soon-to-be ex-spouse. You can barely stand to be in the same room together. So how is mediation going to work? And why should you bother in the first place? Does mediation really get results? And what is involved in the whole process?

Divorce mediation involves you and your spouse getting together under the supervision of a neutral third party, the mediator, to reach mutually acceptable agreements about all of the details which need to be worked out to finalize your divorce. The mediator's job is to keep the conversation going, to keep it productive and focused on the issues which need resolution. A good mediator helps steer you towards problem-solving instead of rehashing old arguments. He or she is not there to pass judgment, take sides, or help you get back together. The sole goal of the mediator is to help you find ways to end your marital entanglements that are fair, workable, and lasting.

Because of the many advantages of divorce mediation, the American Bar Association has endorsed it. In collaboration with national mediation service groups, they have created working guidelines delineated in a publication called Model Standards of Practice for Family and Divorce Mediation. This publication is used by many mediators throughout the country.

What are the advantages of divorce mediation?

In essence, the advantages can be summed up in four words:  time, money, stress, and control. Because you are hammering out your own divorce agreement terms outside of a courtroom, you are not subjected to court schedules, court and litigation costs, the anxiety and duress of contentious courtroom battles, and the dictates and judgments of a Family Court Judge whom you don't know and who only knows you via a public courtroom.  Aside from these huge advantages, the entire mediation process is conducted in private sessions between you and your spouse and the mediator. No one else needs to see or hear about the personal decisions you reach.

If you are parents, mediation protects your children from the stresses and strain of adversarial legal battles. That alone is an advantage that most parents find infinitely attractive.

Not all divorce attorneys practice mediation. At the Law Office of Teresa Beyers, you will find a Los Angeles divorce lawyer who offers and recommends mediation to clients for whom it is appropriate. The firm offers an initial phone consultation to help you find out more about how mediation can benefit you and to get you started.